Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Earth's Mightiest Leather, Spandex, And Temper Tantrums

Today, James and I are going to talk about Marvel's The Avengers. I'm guessing the Marvel part of the title is to indicate this film has nothing to do with the British TV series also titled The Avengers. I think they should have had to change their name. "The Avengers" suits this team so much better!

Earth's mightiest heroes certainly fits the name, and Scarlett and I loved the movie. Some of the reviews we've been using have the term nerdgasm in them. Not quite the same as orgasms, but at the very least a kind of bliss, right?

Oh, yessssssss!

The Avengers Initiative is the creation of SHIELD, headed by Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson), here with his operatives Phil Coulson (Clark Gregg) and Maria Hill (Cobie Smulders).

Things go wrong early in the film when, at a secure facility, a project involving the tesseract, the cube last seen in the film Captain America The First Avenger, is being studied by Doctor Selvig (Stellan Skarsgard, returning from last summer's Thor). The device draws someone to Earth, Loki (Tom Hiddleston), who has plans of his own, and fresh tricks up his sleeve.

Their special consultant, Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is Iron Man--perfect for the Avengers Initiative, if not for Tony's volatile, not-a-team-player personality.

Downey, of course, as Stark, is much more interested in his own pursuits, opening a new building in New York and his growing relationship with Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow, reprising her role briefly after the first two Iron Man films.)

The Avengers are a band of six superheroes, most of who have never met before--except for the elite assassins, Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) and Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson), who obviously have a long history and more than a working relationship. They make Mr. and Mrs. Smith look like amateurs!

And circumstance draws the two of them, for a time, into opposing roles. I was fascinated by the Widow's history with Hawkeye, not to mention her techniques at using deception, stealth, and psychology at the most opportune times. And there is that leather suit she wears....

You're getting ideas, aren't you?

Oh, lots of them, yes!

The Avengers are facing off against Loki (Tom Hiddleston), the Asgardian God of Mischief--yep, from Norse mythology--but according to that great philosopher, Stan Lee, the Norse had it wrong. Asgard is actually another planet, and the "gods" visit us through a wormhole (I wonder if they've ever visited Deep Space Nine?).

An entirely different sci fi universe, darling, believe me....

I think the stuff Loki's doing now is more than mere mischief....

Well, he does have a way of bringing a whole army with him, so that's a lot more than mischief.

I believe Tom Hiddleston now calls him The God of Menace.

It fits him!

Joining Hawkeye and Black Widow in the fight are Thor (Chris Hemsworth), Loki's brother (as Thor is quick to point out, Loki's adopted) and Captain America (Chris Evans), who is well over ninety year old, by my estimation. He looks really, really good for his age, doesn't he?

Super soldier formulas do wonders for the body. And Cap always struck me as the sort who eats an apple a day to keep the doctor away.

Whatever he's doing, he's doing it right!

As for Thor, what a hunk! If it's true about the size of a man's hammer being related to the size of his....

Scarlett, sweetie, children might be reading this!

No, they're not. It has a warning, remember?

Darling, would you be willing to do a bit of role-playing? If you'll suit up as either of these hunks, I promise to put on Black Widow's costume and interrogate you!

Is that a promise? Just the thought of getting... interrogated like that really turns me on!

As long as you give me Thor and Cap!

And then there's the Hulk. This not only happens to him when he's angry, it happens when he's excited. Oh, my....

The Hulk is indeed the last part of the puzzle. Mark Ruffalo is brought in to replace Edward Norton and Eric Bana, who have played the role of Bruce Banner before, and he really suits the character very well. 

He does! This was a smart move!

The thought of what might happen if the Hulk got excited is a slightly disturbing one, you know...

How do you feel about being painted green, love?

James smash!

These guys should have all been on People's Sexiest Man Alive list....

No kidding! The casting teams of these films really did a great job bringing them all together, and Joss Whedon, directing the final product, ended up hitting the ball right out of the park with this film. We're really recommending it.

Now if you'll excuse us, we're going to do a little... interrogation.

You are my prisoner, after all....


  1. Only Scarlett and James could turn a movie review into double entendres and innuendo...

  2. I'll bet they weren't the only ones who got turned on!

  3. Lots of eye candy in this film, that's for sure!!

    1. An estimated 40% of the audience was women. All there for the beefcake buffet!

  4. I'm agreeing with Christina...and Robert Downey Jr heads the list!!

  5. Omg I loved this movie though I want to see it again in a D-Box theatre! I was so happy that bruce banner was soo good, I was really worried after having the hulk played by three different ppl. I was really scared that this third person AGAIN wasn't going to cut it but he completely AMAZED me. Only thing I didn't like was that Natalie portman wasn't in it, I wanted some more closure from the Thor movie... you know after he got stuck in where-ever and couldn't get back or w/e.

  6. oh yeah and hulk using loki like a rag doll... BEST PART!

    1. The roar from the audience when Hulk interrupted Loki's speech was incredible!

  7. "Puny god!" Hulk was definitely not impressed.

    Natalie Portman will be back in the next Thor movie!

  8. One of these days I'll have to catch up so I can get in the loop!

  9. Don't mind us... we're still busy with the, ahem... interrogation.