Saturday, January 8, 2011

How To Get Distracted During An Author Reading

Hello, I'm James, and this darling goddess is Scarlett.

We've never read any of our prose before a live audience before, but how difficult can it be? We've done much more intimate things....

Such as that session of mutual oral pleasures on stage at the Paris Opera House last month. They gave us a standing ovation.

Ah, yes. We received thunderous applause...or was that your orgasm, darling?
Yours too, sweetness. We're here tonight to read some passages from our book, Same Time Tomorrow. A word of caution before we begin. If you're prudish or have a heart condition, you might want to leave the room.

Oh, does get a bit racy, doesn't it? But it's all right, because our Gabriel and Chloe love each other.

 They certainly do. So, with that said, mistress, shall we begin? I was thinking of starting in chapter fourteen.

By all means!

Let's see, ah, here we are. 

She was onscreen on his phone, in an upscale dressing room, the silk peach teddy clinging to her body, small straps on her shoulders, holding it up.

Hmmm, that reminds me of that silk teddy you wore last night.

It worked for Chloe, so I decided to buy one for myself. 

(Scarlett runs her hand up James' thigh.)

You really liked that, didn't you?

It's that obvious, is it? Hmmm, where were we? 

He imagined being there in the room with her, behind her, his hands stroking the fabric, reaching up, letting the straps fall away, cupping her breasts, hearing her sigh.

I do so love hearing you sigh, Mistress....

I'm having trouble concentrating here, lover. When I listen to you reading those hot passages, it drives me wild. 

Maybe we should just show them how we do research....

 (James enfolds Scarlett in his arms from behind and lets his hands wander. In the audience, there are audible gasps.)

Hmmm, how many of them are voyeurs, do you think? Let's do this, you and I... you try to keep concentrating and reading... and I'll let my hands wander all over you. How about that?

Oh, I do like that idea!

As if she could read his mind, she moved her hands to her stomach, as if mimicking his hands. She looked directly at the phone, winked, and moved her hands up, squeezing her breasts. Oh my…. “Again… wow.”
She smiled in delight. “I’m definitely buying it.”
I wish I was right there with you,” he told her.
Me too,” she agreed, looking into the phone.
That’s one way to get banned from the store.”
She laughed again. “True.” She paused. “Gabriel?”
Yes?” He waited, watched her, mesmerized by her.
Give me an hour. Then call me at home.”

(James lets one hand settle over Scarlett's breasts, and she groans and sighs at the podium. Members of the audience look uncomfortable. Others look turned on. His other hand slides downward over her stomach, ever closer....)

Remember when we were mapping out that scene at home?

(Scarlett turns in his arms, fiercely kissing him.)

As if I could ever forget!

(James and Scarlett fall back onto the stage, her on top of him, their hands wandering all over each other. A moderator takes to the stage as the pair throw themselves at each other in a fit of passion.)

Um, yes, that's all very nice and all, but... well, we appear to have lost control of our authors. If you'll come back next week, we've got a children's literature author scheduled, so...

Or you all can just stay around and watch Scarlett and I as we get out of all these pesky clothes and have our way with each other.

We do so enjoy an audience....

(Scarlett starts moaning with pleasure....)

And the more the merrier. It might even inspire... oh, baby, I love having you put your hand there!

(James gets on his back, and Scarlett straddles him.)

I do so love getting lucky in front of an audience, you know...

I do know, darling....


  1. Oh my...that's nice...

    I've always wanted to be a voyeur and I think I just was...more than once...

  2. We--Scarlett and James, that is--are a wicked duo. A Facebook friend told me this morning she'd been thisclose to telling us to get a room....

  3. You'd think people are getting a real eyeful, so to speak.

  4. Is Scarlett an author or a part time Victoria Secret model?

  5. She's never in her clothes long enough to be a Victoria Secret model.

  6. That's the best thing I've read all week. Thank god for my imagination. I can visualize every little detail!

  7. Again, some of the best writing I've read, although I had trouble seeing the words as other images were hard to move out of the way. Love this piece.