Scarlett: Steamy Sentences

And so without further ado, Scarlett selected these sentences (creatively, mind you) from her own portions of the work in progress. Enjoy... and don't mind us getting naked. We do that a lot.

"Mmmmmmm.... And pay no attention to the window washer. He likes to watch...."

Chloe thought of the photographs in her e-mail box and felt the heat in her cheeks. I'm blushing, she thought, trying in vain to push those images from her thoughts. Not here. Oh, not here, not now! Aloud, she said, "Just this morning, in fact."

You idiot, she mentally reprimanded herself. He's naked. You just kissed a very naked Gabriel, and acted as though it was no big deal.


At the mention of the webcam, Chloe felt the blood rush to her cheeks. 


“I'll be your slave girl. Your every wish is my command.”

James: Six Seductive Sentences

We've seen these blogs elsewhere, and Scarlett and I thought we'd take our own particular shot at it, with six sentences each, taken from various places in our work in progress, Same Time Tomorrow. Here are six I've chosen from my side of writing the book:

“After all, the lady has no idea where a dog like you has been.”

"Someone who’d find those dimples of yours irresistible would be nice."

"This isn’t going to turn into the Donner Party, you know.”

Any time you want to get moving and bother the Netherlands or Germany, feel free.

As his tongue drove her towards orgasm, she moaned, running her fingers through his hair, calling out his name…

You’re my mistress… my lover… and I belong to you.

St. Valentine's Day: Advice, Flirtations, and Arched Eyebrows

Happy Valentine's Day all!

We've seen so many Valentine-themed blogs in the past few days that we decided we just had to offer our own thoughts on how to celebrate this holidays for lovers. Candy and flowers are nice, girls, but what do you really want from your man? And men, what would you like your women to do to show you they love you?

A very happy Valentine's Day indeed!

It's a day meant to celebrate love and affection. It's a day where the florists and chocolatiers are at their busiest. It's a day filled with Valentine's cards. In fact, as Scarlett can tell you, it's one of our favourite days.

I'll start by suggesting that as men, we like to feel appreciated.

I know how you like to be appreciated, darling, but maybe you should give our readers some details.

Oh, yes, we're supposed to be behaving ourselves and giving them tips and thoughts.

What do we men want? No, not a case of beer in front of the television. At least not if we're worth anything. I know that's a common stereotype, but not all of us are like that.

It's the little things, really, that make us feel appreciated. Those small gestures of affection. It might just be a momentary rub of an arm. A pat on the back. A kind word.

Oh, and we really like back rubs.

Now when did I ever want you to behave yourself, sweetheart?

Girls, try the back rubs. Try a full-body massage. Try a warm, sensuous bath for two. Sip champagne. Eat chocolate dipped strawberries.

Better yet, feed them to him. Give him a shave. 

A shave, yes. It implies a great deal of trust, guys. She's got that sharp razor at your throat, after all.

And by the way, gentlemen, feeding her those strawberries too is a very good idea. They're tasty... they're good for energy, and both of you will need that energy.

Just take your time. Make sure that champagne's the good kind. And while you've got her in that tub, give her legs a rub. Yes, it might well lead to more vigorous activities, so to speak.... but do it just for the sake of doing it too.

Now, speaking of full body massages, there was this time Scarlett and I got carried away with ourselves in the governor's mansion...

I still don't understand why everyone was so upset. The press catching us certainly drew attention away from the accusations being hurled at him....

We ended up on the cover of every newspaper in the state and the National Enquirer.  I thought we looked fabulous! I don't know why they put those silly black ribbons across our private parts, though....

They're perfectly natural parts of the anatomy, after all, but some people....

Anyway, where were we? Oh, yes. Talking about massages. You can make it a mutual thing, guys. Let her massage you, and do the same in return. And I strongly suggest lots and lots of practice.

And while we're at it, try a couple's massage. Take a weekend away. Go to one of those all inclusive inns. Have a couple's massage done. It's a wonderful way to unwind...

Go to a cozy bed and breakfast, just the two of you. Pamper each other. Indulge each other's fantasies. 

Like that naughty nun James enjoys so much....

The naughty nun. And you look so ravishing in a habit.

Or that dashing swordsman you so adore....

Ah, Zorro. The fox. And James does look so very foxy in that cape, boots, mask, hat...and nothing else. 
His sword is impressive. And that sabre's not bad, either.

Special Award!

Though we already gave out three Cold Shower Awards this week, another steamy blog has come to our attention that we feel deserves special  merit. And so we give the fourth Cold Shower Award to Telega Tales and Tart Cookies.


Check it out!  And Karla...you have to promise to NEVER do that again!

The Cold Shower Award

Scarlett and I came up with the idea some time ago for the Cold Shower Award. It was after finding this little treasure of a picture.....

So what is the Cold Shower Award? We've decided that it should go to blogs whose current or future work gets the readers hot and bothered, aroused, and turned on... and not in that order. It's for those blogs whose contents are not safe reading for work, or might be given to adding on pictures such as the above.

Here's how we made use of that picture:

So, to start things off, we have three blogs we subscribe to that we want to give this to.

Romance Writers Behaving Badly is certainly deserving of the honors, given its track record as a spicy and sultry blog.

My Character's Lives is a character blog written by Beth, whose current work is leading into the steamy side of things.

Smart Bitches Trashy Books certainly speaks for itself.

Check these blogs out. Just don't do so with little children or the church elders looking over your shoulder. You're bound to get rather red faced.

Now if you'll excuse me, Scarlett's expecting me in the shower. And I don't want to keep her waiting....

Bring In The Designated Dick

Today Scarlett and I are commenting on a bit of an odd story that's come up, namely a fellow who's divorcing his wife, for the simple reason that she's expecting too much sex from him. Seems the lady is a nymphomaniac, and he's exhausted. The original article is from myfox New York, and we're copying the link and the text here, just so you don't think we're making this up

http://www.myfoxny.com/dpps/news/offbeat/man-seeks-police-protection-from-sex-crazed-wife-dpgonc-20110126-gc_11594496#


WAIBLINGEN, Germany -- A Turkish man living in Germany with his wife of 18 years went to police for protection from her insatiable appetite for sex, Bild newspaper reported Wednesday.
The man went to police in the southwestern German city of Waiblingen on Tuesday.
He told police he slept on a sofa for the past four years in a futile attempt to escape the voracious embraces of his wife.
German police said the exhausted man -- who fathered two children with his wife -- decided to get a divorce and move out of the home.
"He has decided to get a divorce and to move out ... in the hope of finally getting some rest, particularly as he is anxious to arrive at work well rested," police said.
"At the moment this is impossible because he says his wife keeps coming into the living room demanding that he perform his marital duties. He asked for police help in getting some sleep at night," police added.

On behalf of all guys, I ask this man one question.... dude, why are you complaining???

He should consider himself extremely fortunate. I never hear any complaints from you when I demand frequent sex.

Frequent sex is fun, darling. Speaking of which, that thing you did with your tongue last night...


You liked that, did you?


Very much, yes, and it made me think of... oh, we're supposed to be talking about this fellow who's complaining about having too much sex for some inexplicable reason. Look, sir, if you're having a problem keeping up with her... maybe you need some Viagra.

Well, I suppose if she's too much woman for him, he could allow her a few extra men on the side. Just for sex, mind you.

Exactly! A designated dick. Think about it, man. You've been married for eighteen years, had kids with her... you wouldn't have invested all that time if you didn't feel something for her. So, to save your marriage, you should let her get some action on the side. And if you're comfortable watching, by all means.

Now there's a thought. Sort of like a pinch hitter? Is that what they call it in baseball?

They do! And speaking of pinching....

And sir, invest in a really good videorecorder! You'll want to watch those videos again and again....

You will! Okay, okay, maybe you're a bit uptight. Maybe the idea of another guy or three or four satisfying your wife while you're taking a breather might annoy you. Maybe you can't face the idea of joining a swinger's club and sitting at the bar drinking a vodka on the rocks while your wife gets her world rocking.

Three words for you to consider as alternatives for her: Vibrator. Dildo. Cucumber.

Cucumber. She can eat it afterward. Oh, wait a minute.  Speaking of eating....

Darling goddess, we're still in the midst of blogging!

I can multitask...though I don't really consider this a task....

Oh, yes, right there, oh, that feels soooooo goooooood... oh, we're being watched.

Look, sir, one last piece of advice. If you can't face the idea of letting other guys pleasure your wife, and the idea of going into a sex shop to buy vibrators or dildos leaves you mortified, well, there's one more alternative.

Have an anatomically correct robot built. 

That would be expensive, darling. I can't speak for the woman in question, but I'm not sure I'd want to be humped by a robot!

It might be this poor chap's only chance to save his marriage. When in doubt, build a robot. I'm sure I heard that somewhere.

Would you hump a robot?

Oh, I wouldn't. I've seen too many science fiction movies, so I'd be expecting the thing to turn all evil on me. Fortunately that's not a consideration considering you and I share a bed. Speaking of which, why don't we go back to fondling and groping...?

Mmmmmm...I thought you'd never ask....

Character Blog: Terry McKay

And another supporting character blog, this time from the point of view of one of Gabriel's friends....

***


I'm a lucky man.

I've got a terrific wife, Helen, the love of my life. We've been blessed with three wonderful children who've grown up and are making their way in the world... and at some point are going to make me a gra...  a gra... oh, you know what I mean. Saying that word is a wee bit difficult.

I get to work in a field I love. I'm an historian, but not an academic. I never thought I'd have the qualities to teach. Helen has that talent; she teaches law to undergrads at the University of Edinburgh. Instead I go out into the field, and I write. Some of it means freelance assignments, and some is directed for books I'm working on. I'm writing what I hope will be the authoritative history of my home town.

Now I'm down in the Lake District for a few weeks. I'm on assignment for National Geographic. They want an article on the area, its history and people. You know the sort of thing. How tourism is a boost for the area, the culture, the land. I'm writing, of course, interviewing people, visiting archives, gathering information. I'm working with a photographer I'm friends with. Gabriel Miller's an Irish-American, does the whole travelling gypsy thing as well as I do. He's twenty or so years younger then I am, but a pro, and damned good with a camera. And he's like the little brother I never had, so of course we tease each other relentlessly.

He's finally found someone. He's talked about her, a woman named Chloe. She seems to suit him. He misses being with her. He's worried about her, I can see it. And with good reason. Her mother is dying, and he wishes he could be back home with her to see her through it.

Now we're stuck indoors. The biggest storm in decades has settled in over the British Isles. The lightning and the thunder are flashing and rolling, the wind is howling. It's raining cats and dogs out there, and we really can't get out and do anything. Not unless we want to catch our deaths with a cold.

The phone lines are down, and the same's the case with cell phones. Hell, for that matter, we can't get wireless coverage for our computers. He keeps staring out the window, wishing he could talk to her. I know the feeling. I miss hearing Helen's voice, but she knows what the weather's like right now. Edinburgh's getting this downpour too, after all.

From what he's said, Chloe's had it rough in life. She finds it hard to trust men. And he's wanting nothing more then to reassure her he's fine, to hear her talking back. He'd rest easier if he knew she knew how bad the weather is out here. It's not that likely. From what he says, American media only pays attention to storms overseas if the death toll goes into the triple figures or if there's an American involved.

For now, we're stuck. Reading books at this nice bed and breakfast, playing chess (which I know Gabriel would never do unless he was bored already), and wondering when the weather will clear. Here we are in one of the best hiking areas in the world... and we're indoors.

Okay, Mother Nature. I know England's got a reputation for foul weather at the best of times, but enough already!

We can see either Tom Wilkinson or Robbie Coltrane in this character...