Of Interviews And Carnal Pleasures, Part One

A living room. Four writers are gathered together, William Kendall and Norma Beishir sitting on one of the room, and the pairing of Scarlett Martin and James Morgan on the other. Scarlett and James are in very close company. He's got one arm wrapped around her shoulders, and she's stroking one of his thighs. And he's nuzzling her neck. William and Norma look at each other, rolling their eyes.

 

William: Shall we get started?

 

James: Oh, very well.

 

Scarlett: Can you give us a half hour first?

Norma: For what? We've already postponed this interview four times.

Scarlett: We have some research that just can't wait.

James: Yes, that's it. Research. We're sticklers for getting it right.

 

William: So we've heard. You're into very extensive field research.

 

Scarlett: Hands on field research at that. And we do so like to choreograph some of our more... graphic scenes. In fact, just this morning James was between my legs, his tongue driving me over the....

 

William: Could we stay on topic?

 

James: We are on topic. 

 

Scarlett: That's right, we're talking about choreographing our sex scenes for the book. Therefore we have to talk about sex.

 

James: And demonstrate.

 

Scarlett: Oh, that's such a lovely idea.

 

William: Look, we've come to talk about your jointly authored book, Same Time Tomorrow. Now, how did you... James, would you kindly stop licking Scarlett's neck?

James: Just making sure I've got it right, chap.

Scarlett:  Oh you've definitely got it right....but could you do that again,just to be sure?

James: My pleasure.

Norma: Come on, you two! Knock it off!

James: Knock you up...now that's something we haven't done yet, goddess. Is it true women are hornier when they're preggers?

Norma: I said knock it off, not knock her up!

Scarlett: We'd have to learn some new positions. You know, for when my belly is really big. That could be fun....

James: And Chloe does get pregnant...

Scarlett: Not until the next book.

James: Are you sure?

Scarlett: Fairly certain.

 

William: You're giving away plot points now?

 

James: We're teasing the readers.

 

Scarlett: And teasing each other.

 

James: She likes when I tease her. And tickle her. And massage her.

Scarlett: And I like massaging him back. See, there's this thing we do with naked massages and using every bit of our bodies on each other...

 

William: Okay, if we could call this to order? You're writing this book, sort of a he-said, she-said sort of thing.

 

Scarlett: And a he-did, she-did scenario.

 

William: How is that going? Do you two have any... Scarlett, why are you taking his shirt off?

Scarlett: Research, William. Research.

James: Necessary research.

Norma: Could this wait until the interview is finished, please?

Scarlett: Ohhhh, James....

Norma: James, what are you doing to her? Ohmygod! Not here....

Scarlett: moaning with pleasure... Oh, baby, do that again...

Norma: William, they're undressing each other....

Scarlett: Oh, yes! Yes!

 

William: That's not the only thing they're doing....

 

Clothes are quickly scattered everywhere. Scarlett settles back on the couch, and James settles his head between her legs. She groans, wrapping her legs around his body. James drives her closer and closer to the edge, his hands rubbing over her body. William and Norma watch, and roll their eyes again. 

Norma: William, do you think we should continue this later?

 

William: Maybe give them a half hour to themselves....

 

Scarlett: No! Oh, Gooodddd... right there, baby... no, stay! James and I like having an audieeence! Oh, James! Right there!!